| Speaker
|
Dialogue
|
| (Things start off high in the mountains with gray skies.)
|
| Anne
|
(While checking the map) Hey, looks like we're almost halfway to Newtopia, HP.
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| Hop Pop
|
Yep, making good time.
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| Anne
|
I gotta say, this trip has been a lot smoother than I thought it'd be.
|
| Hop Pop
|
Yep!
|
| Anne
|
But the one thing I'd change...
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| Hop Pop
|
The only thing I'd change...
|
| (Sprig and Polly are heard fighting.)
|
| Sprig
|
Stop pushing me!
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| Polly
|
NO! You stop pushing ME!
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| Hop Pop
|
Iiiis that.
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| Polly
|
Get that stupid stuff out of my face!
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| Sprig
|
Well, sorry for showing you all this cool moss I found! (Polly hits him.) Ow! What was that for?
|
| Polly
|
I saw a punch bug! Punch bug! (hits him again)
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| Sprig
|
For the last time, I'm not playing punch bu... (Polly hits him again) Ow!
|
| Anne
|
Two weeks of nonstop arguing really starting to wear on me.
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| Hop Pop
|
At least they're keeping it in the fwagon this time.
|
| (Polly comes out of the fwagon with Sprig's hat and inhales.)
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| Polly (in Sprig's voice)
|
Look everyone, I'm Sprig. (looks at Hop Pop) Look at all this dumb moss I found. (throws moss in Hop Pop's face) Wow! Wow! Wow! Wow! Wow! Wow! (In to Hop Pop's ear and in a deep tone) Woooooooow!
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| Sprig
|
(After he comes out of the fwagon) Oh, yeah? (inhales)
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| Sprig (in Polly's voice)
|
Well, I'm Polly, (he clings to Anne) and I decided we're all playing punch bug. (hits Anne) Punch bug!
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| Polly (in Sprig's voice)
|
Wow! Wow!
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| Sprig (in Polly's voice)
|
(While hitting Anne) Punch bug! Punch bug!
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| Anne
|
Okay, this is incredibly annoying, but I have to say, their impressions of each other are spot on.
|
| Hop Pop
|
Yep, always had a knack for that.
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| Anne
|
(despaired) Oh, I don't think I can take two more weeks of this. If only there were some way to get them to stop fighting.
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| Hop Pop
|
(stops Bessie when he sees something) Ya!
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| Anne, Sprig and Polly
|
Whoa!
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| Anne
|
What the heck, dude? I almost bit my tongue.
|
| Hop Pop
|
Shh! (points it) Look!
|
| (An unusual fork is shown, then Polly reads aloud the sign pointing to the weirdest road.)
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| Polly
|
"Quarreler's Pass. A road to reconciliation for weary travel-mates." Okay, so what?
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| Sprig
|
Wait, Polly, you don't think they're gonna...
|
| (Anne and Hop Pop dump Sprig and Polly on the path to Quarreler's Pass. The two grunt.)
|
| Sprig
|
What?
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| Polly
|
You're seriously leaving us here?
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| Hop Pop
|
Aw, quit your bellyaching. (flips the sign) It says right here that the paths meet up eventually.
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| Anne
|
(while pulling her hair) Your fighting is driving us nuts! You brought this upon yourselves!
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| Polly
|
This is all Sprig's fault for (hits him) being so zippy and obnoxious all the time!
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| Sprig
|
Me? (hits her) You're the one who's punching everyone!
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| Polly
|
No, you are!
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| Sprig
|
No, you are!
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| Hop Pop
|
Mm-hmm. See you kids on the other side and good luck.
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| Anne
|
Here. If you get in trouble, just call me. (tosses Sprig her phone, which hits him)
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| Sprig
|
Ow!
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| Hop Pop
|
Heeyah!
|
| (Anne and Hop Pop flee with the fwagon on the safe path)
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| Sprig
|
(confused) Call me?
|
| (Anne and Hop Pop are shown laughing.)
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| Anne
|
"Call me?" (she hits her forehead) Argh! There's only one phone!
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| Hop Pop
|
I don't get it.
|
| (Back with Sprig and Polly.)
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| Sprig
|
I don't get it. (pockets Anne's phone)
|
| (Sprig and Polly watch the passage for a moment.)
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| Polly
|
Let's just get this over with. (trips him and runs away)' Try to keep up, slowpoke.
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| Sprig
|
(grabs her) Oh, no, (throws her back) you don't! (runs away: Polly chases him)
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| (Sprig and Polly hit the first challenge of the step while hitting each other. Polly bumps into the sign and reads it aloud.)
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| Polly
|
"The Beam of Balance"? (chuckles) More like the beam of... (collides with Sprig while running towards the Beam) Race you across!
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| Sprig
|
Hey! (chase her) Get back here, you dang cheater!
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| Polly
|
Eat my dust, lame-o! (The beam starts to move) Huh? Whoa! (falls) (screams) Help me, lame-o!
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| Sprig
|
Hang on!(sticks his tongue out, grabs her and holds her in his mouth)
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| Polly
|
Thanks.
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| Sprig
|
(spits her out) Polly, I think we're supposed to go across slowly. (gets on all fours and goes on tiptoe)
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| (Polly does the same as Sprig while sighing.)
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| Sprig
|
Okay. This works. Yeah. Slow and steady.
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| Polly
|
This is gonna take forever. Let's just jump.
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| Sprig
|
Jump? I can't make that, it's wider than Croaker's Creek.
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| Polly
|
(laughs) Remember when you tried to jump over Croaker's Creek?
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| Sprig
|
Yeah, don't remind me.
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| Polly
|
You landed right on a cactus flower! All those spikes sticking out of your... (gasps) Wait! Remember Croaker's Creek?
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| Sprig
|
Yeah! I don't wanna talk about it!
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| Polly
|
No, no! There was a rickety bridge, remember? And the only way we got across was...
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| Sprig
|
(gasps) The walk-and-roll! Polly, you're a flipping genius! (both strain) (sighs) Forgot where I was.
|
| (Sprig and Polly start to do the trick.)
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| Polly
|
Let's roll! And walk.
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| Sprig
|
Okay, ready. Whoa! Whoa! Okay, left. (Polly grunts) Right! Left! Right! Left! (talks fast) Right! Left! Right! Left!
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| (Sprig and Polly manage to get to the other side while falling. Then they stand up.)
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| Sprig and Polly
|
We did it!
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| Polly
|
Now, let's breeze through this thing so we can slap Hop Pop.
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| Sprig
|
I support that. Huh. Wonder how those two are doing without us?
|
| (Back with Anne and Hop Pop... Wind howling.)
|
| Hop Pop
|
Finally. Peace and quiet. Almost a little too quiet. (chuckles: nervous) Almost a little awkward, isn't it?
|
| (Anne opens her eyes and stares at Hop Pop.)
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| Hop Pop
|
So do you have a boyfriend back home?
|
| (Anne kicks Hop Pop out of the fwagon.)
|
| (Back with Sprig and Polly, they begin to sing while overcoming challenges of the pass.)
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| Sprig
|
♪ They call us The impossible two ♪
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| Polly
|
♪ A super-duper Brother-sister crew ♪
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| Sprig
|
♪ We're a team that can't be beat ♪ ♪ Always gonna land On our feet ♪
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| Polly
|
♪ We're almost all the way through ♪ ♪ But the end of the pass is fake ♪ (Sprig bumps into the wall) It's fake.
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| Sprig
|
What the heck? Someone blocked off the pass and painted it to look like the end? Weird.
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| Polly
|
Must be another test. What if we took (points it) that tunnel over there?
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| (Sprig and Polly come to the tunnel, it looks dark, dirty and dangerous.)
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| Sprig
|
Okay.
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| Polly
|
(she and Sprig go) All right! Test passed!
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| Polly
|
Hmm, that was too easy.
|
| Sprig
|
Or maybe we're just the best!
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| Sprig and Polly
|
Yeah!(High Five)
|
| (Sprig uses the flashlight on Anne's cell phone. He and Polly notice the tunnel getting smaller.)
|
| Sprig
|
Oh, perspective.
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| Polly
|
Clever.
|
| (Sprig and Polly enter the narrow tunnel.)
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| Sprig
|
Okay. Not much farther. Hopefully.
|
| (Sprig accidentally steps on Polly's tail.)
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| Polly
|
(screams) Hey!
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| Sprig
|
Oops. My bad!
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| Polly
|
(hits him) Watch (while saliva comes out and spits it on Sprig) where you're putting your big, dumb feet!
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| Sprig
|
You watch where you put your (kicks her with his foot) big, dumb spit!
|
| Polly
|
Ugh! You're so annoying!
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| Sprig
|
No, you are!
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| Polly
|
No, you are!
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| Sprig
|
No, you are!
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| Polly
|
No, you are!
|
| Sprig
|
No, you are!
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| Polly
|
No, you are!
|
| Sprig
|
No, you are!
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| Polly
|
No, you are!
|
| (Sprig and Polly come to a couple of tunnels)
|
| Sprig
|
No, you are!
|
| Polly
|
No, you are!
|
| Sprig
|
No, you are!
|
| Polly
|
Would you look at that? Two tunnels. Why don't you take that one and find another pollywog to step on?
|
| Sprig
|
Fine! And maybe you can annoy someone else in that one!
|
| Polly
|
Fine!
|
| Sprig
|
Fine!
|
| (Sprig and Polly are separated by the tunnels. Sprig mutters in frustration as he walks. Polly pulls out a light mushroom and gets angry.)
|
| Polly
|
He thinks I'm annoying? He's the annoying one.
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| Sprig
|
I can hear you! These rock walls are surprisingly thin!
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| Polly
|
YOU'RE surprisingly thin!
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| Voice
|
Good one. (Polly looks and sees a huge snake-like creature staring at her) (growls) Hi.
|
| Polly
|
(screams)
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| Female Olm
|
Whoops, didn't mean to frighten you.
|
| Polly
|
That's okay.
|
| Female Olm
|
I meant to eat you!
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| (Polly screams and runs away from the creature.)
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| Polly
|
There's a giant wormy thing! It's trying to eat me!
|
| Sprig
|
I'll save you! (runs into another creature)
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| Male Olm
|
And I'll save you for dessert.
|
| (Sprig backs up, but falls down a hole and ends up in a mountain of bones.)
|
| Sprig
|
Well, this isn't a good sign.
|
| (Polly falls down a hole and ends up in the mountain of bones.)
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| Polly
|
Well, this isn't a good sign.
|
| Sprig
|
I just said that!
|
| (The two olms arrive and look at Sprig and Polly.)
|
| Male Olm
|
Ah, good catch, Lysil.
|
| Lysil
|
Yes, Angwin, and they sound juicy.
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| Polly
|
(screams) How many of you weirdos are there?
|
| (Lysil and Angwin are laughing. Sprig and Polly part ways as they watch Lysil and Angwin exit the tunnels and reveal they are conjoined.)
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| Lysil and Angwin
|
Only one.
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| Polly
|
WHAT THE...
|
| Sprig
|
Shh! I don't think they can see us.
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| Lysil
|
No, but we can hear you. And it's only a matter of time before my bro and I find ya!
|
| Angwin
|
That's how we olms do.
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| Polly
|
Oh, yeah? Well...
|
| (Sprig covers Polly and they go to another wall. Polly sees a crack.)
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| Polly
|
Into the crack!
|
| (Sprig and Polly enter the crack and take refuge. Angwin can't eat them and gets frustrated.)
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| Angwin
|
(gnawing) Oh, great. We lost 'em in the crack 'cause you were dragging your feet.
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| Lysil
|
Okay. A, we don't have feet. And B, I could've helped if you'd bothered to communicate at all.
|
| Angwin
|
I said "Over here!" Try listening for once.
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| Lysil
|
Ugh! Just help me find a stick to pry them out of the crack. You are literally a pain in my backside.
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| Angwin
|
Ugh! I'm a pain? You're the pain!
|
| Lysil
|
No, you are!
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| Angwin
|
No, you are!
|
| Lysil
|
No, you are!
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| Angwin
|
No, you are!
|
| (Sprig and Polly listen to Lysil and Angwin and start to get frustrated.)
|
| Lysil
|
No, you are!
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| Angwin
|
No, you are!
|
| Lysil
|
You are!
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| Angwin
|
You are!
|
| Sprig
|
Ah! All this bickering is driving me crazy.
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| Polly
|
It's like wearing a beehive on your head.
|
| Sprig
|
Can you imagine having to listen to this for more than an hour?
|
| Polly
|
Or two weeks?
|
| Sprig
|
From the back of a wagon?
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| Lysil
|
No, you are!
|
| Angwin
|
No, you are!
|
| (Sprig and Polly start to wail.)
|
| Sprig
|
I guess Hop Pop and Anne were right to ditch us here.
|
| Polly
|
If we get out of this, maybe we can call a truce. Not argue for a couple weeks? Give them a break?
|
| Sprig
|
Deal!
|
| Lysil
|
No, you are!
|
| Angwin
|
No, you are!
|
| (Sprig and Polly spit in their hands and shake hands.)
|
| Polly
|
Now then, how to escape two, mostly blind, argumentative siblings? (she and Sprig come out of hiding) (gasps) I have an idea that might make an impression. (winks at Sprig)
|
| Sprig
|
Something in your eye?
|
| Polly
|
Just follow my lead!
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| Angwin
|
Okay, whatever. Let's just eat these kids and get back to never talking to each other again.
|
| Lysil
|
Ugh! Finally. A good idea out of your mouth. Now, let's find that stick already.
|
| (Polly inales.)
|
| Polly (in Angwin's voice)
|
Do it yourself, you smelly dum-dum!
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| Lysil
|
(gasps) Who you calling dum-dum? Yeah, I found your stick. Right here! (hits him with a bone)
|
| Angwin
|
Ow! Hey! (Sprig sticks his tongue out and grabs a stalactite and climbs to a higher part of the cave) Watch where you're swinging that thing!
|
| (Sprig inales.)
|
| Sprig (in Lysil's voice)
|
Not my fault, you've got such a humongous swollen head, brother!
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| Angwin
|
Hey! Now that's uncalled for! Take this! (bites her on the neck and pushes her into a wall, causing a landslide)
|
| Lysil
|
(screams) Biting, is it?
|
| (Sprig dodges Lysil, Angwin and the collapse while the two start fighting, unfortunately, Sprig ends up in Angwin's mouth.)
|
| Polly
|
(gasps) Spriiiiig!
|
| Lysil
|
(she's about to fall in Angwin) Belly flop!
|
| (Lysil falls on Angwin and spits out Sprig, while he pants, Polly takes him)
|
| Polly
|
Get up! Come on!
|
| (Sprig and Polly go to another exit tunnel above the cave.)
|
| Sprig
|
Move, move, move!
|
| (Lysil and Angwin's fight is seen.)
|
| Angwin
|
Mom always liked me best!
|
| Lysil
|
That's because she had terrible taste!
|
| (Sprig and Polly come out of the cave, jump down and finally the danger ends. They pant and start laughing.)
|
| Polly
|
Whoo, man. Promise me we never end up like that.
|
| Sprig
|
Us? Are you kidding? We're way too good of a team.
|
| Polly
|
Bring it in, buddy.
|
| (Sprig and Polly hug.)
|
| Polly
|
Hmm, looks like we're back on the road. Where's Anne and Hop Pop?
|
| Sprig
|
Yeah, they should be here by now. (Hop Pop mumbling) Wait, do you hear that?
|
| Hop Pop
|
A relationship is like a farm. You plant a seed of trust and it grows into a better relationship.
|
| Sprig
|
Anne, over here! Anne!
|
| Polly
|
Hi! Sup?
|
| Anne
|
You two! Thank frog!
|
| Sprig
|
Anne, you'll be glad to know we've decided to stop...
|
| Anne
|
(Grabs them and sit them on the fwagon) I don't care! I need you to fill the silences. Hop Pop can't deal with them! He can't deal with them!
|
| Hop Pop
|
Oh, hey, kids. Didn't see you there. How'd the trials go?
|
| Polly
|
It was fine, except for the bloodthirsty olms.
|
| Sprig
|
And you'll be glad to know we've decided to stop arguing...
|
| Hop Pop
|
(interrupts him) That's great, Sprig. Anyway, we were just getting into the nitty-gritty. Now that you guys are back, we can talk about Anne's boyfriend again.
|
| (Anne kicks Hop Pop into the void. He screams from free fall.)
|
