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[At the Plantar Farm, Sprig is looking at Anne's stuff.]
Sprig: Wow, Anne, look at all your cool stuff! What's this? [He picks up a toenail clipper.] Ah, I get it. Torture device.
Anne: That's a toenail clipper.
Sprig: Oh, okay, okay, sure. Oh! How about this? [He holds up a bike pump.] What does this do? [He pumps air into his mouth and speaks with a muffled voice.] It's painful. [The air hisses as it comes out] Oh, and this. [He clicks a cat pen.] Oh, I love this. This is amazing.
Anne: You know what? You can keep it.
[A bell's clanging is heard from upstairs.]
Hop Pop: Kids! Chow time! [In the kitchen, Hop Pop is serving a meal. Anne and Sprig bang their fists on the table while Polly flaps her arms.]
Kids: Time to eat! Time to eat!
Hop Pop: Hold on, you kids. Hold on.
Kids: Time to eat!
[Hop Pop hands out everyone's food, and Anne is immediately put off by it.]
Anne: Ugh! Uh, you know what? I think I'm gonna pass. [She gently pushes her bowl ahead.]
Hop Pop: Why? Is my food not good enough for the princess?
Anne: Well, if I'm the princess, then you're the king of bad cooking. [chuckles]
Sprig: Ohhh!
Polly: Oh oh oh!
Hop Pop: Oh, yeah? Well, you... I...
Anne: What's the matter, Hop Pop? Frog in your throat?
Polly: Ohhh!
Sprig: Oh, she got you again!
Hop Pop: Oh, dang it! You know what? I'm gonna take a nap. I don't believe this. I feed you, I house you, and this is how you repay me? If you don't shape up soon, Anne, I'm throwin' you out! [He slams his bedroom door and a flower vase falls down.]
Anne: Yeesh. What's his problem? [She grabs a cane and hunches over speaking like an old man] I'm Hop Pop, and I cook bad and have a temper problem!
[laughing]
Sprig: That's so Hop Pop!
Anne: Eat your aphids, don't play with them. Elbows off the table!
[The siblings laugh again.]
Anne: Sometimes I wonder why I even bother putting up with you at all!
[She breaks the cane; Sprig and Polly gasp.]
Anne: Oopsies. Guess I don't know my own strength, right, guys? You guys okay? What's the big deal? It's just one cane.
Sprig: That wasn't just any cane. It was Hop Pop's special cane, passed down from his father, Hop Poppity Pop, all the way from his father, Hop-and-Lock-Drop Soppity Pop.
Anne: Oh! You guys gotta help me. He's gonna kick me out the second he finds out about this. I cannot go back to living in a cave!
[A flashback begins with a thunderclap. Anne is curled up on the cave floor as dozens of bugs surround her. Water falls on her face.]
Anne: Uhhh! The nights were the hardest.
Sprig: Don't worry, Anne. We'll do whatever it takes to help you.
Polly: Eh, count me out.
Sprig: Polly!
Polly: What? I hardly know her.
Anne: Would you help me for one of these? [pulls a candy bar out of her pocket]
Polly: [gasps] Candy from another world? Lady, you've got yourself a deal.
Anne: Glad to hear it. Now, let's try to save my skin.
All: Yeah!
Anne: Okay, maybe we can't fix it, but someone else can? Someone good with... wood?
Sprig: Anne, you're a genius! We'll just take it to Leopold Loggle, the woodsmith. He loves wood. Almost a little too much.
Loggle: Uh-huh. Oh, oh, yes. Well, aren't you fascinating? Yes, you are.
Anne: Can you fix it?
Loggle: As a matter of fact, I can... not.
Sprig: Huh. Can you make a new one?
Loggle: Absolutely... no way.
Polly: Do you have one we could buy?
Loggle: Of course I do... n't. I don't.
Anne: Why do you keep doing that?
Loggle: Old smithing accident. You don't want to know.
Anne: Uh, okay, so--
Loggle: Tripped on an anvil. Landed neck-first on a metal pipe. Pierced my voice box clean through!
Polly: Blegh!
Anne: Dude, come on!
Sprig: Cool.
Loggle: Switched over to wood after that. Anyhow, I'm afraid I can't do much for you. That cane was made with wood from the incredibly rare, extremely dangerous Doom Tree!
[all gasp]
Loggle: Few have made it to the Doom Tree alive, fewer yet returned. It holds many secrets that mortals dare not--
Anne: Dude, it's a tree. Just tell us where it is.
Sprig: Yeah, Loggle, cut the chitchat!
Polly: You're bald!
Loggle: Okay, okay. I got a map to the Doom Tree right here, but it'll cost ya.
Anne: Click. [takes a picture with her phone; shows it to Loggle]
Loggle: Or you could do that for free.
Anne: Come on, guys. We gotta hurry. Hop Pop could wake up at any second!
Both: Right!
Loggle: Be careful, you kids. It's cursed, I tell ya. Cursed!
Anne: To the Doom Tree, everyone.
Polly: Whoo-hoo!
Sprig: Yeah! Whoa, Loggle. We gotta talk about this, man. We're comin' back. We're gonna talk about this. All right, good-bye.
[beeping]
[tires screech]
[beeping continues]
[bird screeches]
Anne: [grunting] Hold up. We're here. Now, that is an ugly tree.
Sprig: Just one of Mother Nature's horrible mistakes.
Polly: [chuckles] Frogs died here.
Anne: Look. That branch is perfect. [grunting]
Polly: You people and your legs.
Anne: [grunting]
Sprig: [spitting]
Anne: Careful. The tree is cursed. Pfft! [laughs]
Sprig: [laughs]
Anne: Okay, seriously though, on three. One, two...
[shrieking]
Anne: Uh, did the tree just scream?
[Doom Tree roars]
Sprig: Whoa, whoa, whoa!
[grunts]
[roars]
[roaring]
Sprig: Oh, hey, it's maple.
Anne: Run!
[all screaming]
[shrieking]
Anne: That thing is not a tree. It's some kind of grody bug!
Sprig: A bug that wants to kill us!
Polly: Less talky-talky, more runny-runny!
[roaring]
Sprig: [grunting] Whoa! [grunts] Waaah!
[shrieking]
[groaning]
Anne: [screaming]
[grunting, panting]
[shrieking]
Loggle: [sighs] Well, Loggle, another day, another step closer to bankrupt-- Eh?
[Anne shouts]
[roaring]
Loggle: What the-- What's going on?
Anne: Don't ask questions!
[all scream]
[Doom Tree roars]
[all screaming]
Anne: What's it gonna take to get rid of this thing? [grunts]
[shrieking]
Anne: [grunting]
[bell rings]
Anne: Oh, this is nice. [grunts]
Leopold Loggle: That took 20 years to carve.
[shrieks]
[puzzled shriek]
Polly: Yah! Yah yah yah yah yah! And that! And that! Hi-yah!
Anne: [grunts] Charge!
Sprig: Charge!
[squealing]
Sprig: I'm gonna sand your face!
Polly: Phew.
Anne: Termites! Why would a woodsmith have termites?
Loggle: I'm a complicated man!
Anne: Incoming!
[squeals]
[grunts]
Polly: Uh...
Sprig: Cool.
Anne: This world is messed up.
[whimpering]
Anne: Up top!
Sprig: We did it!
Polly: That was awesome, you guys!
Anne: Now, let's get this cane back to Hop Pop.
Loggle: Give me that!
Anne: Hey!
Polly: What gives, Loggle?
Loggle: I'll tell you what gives. This doesn't even begin to cover the damages you've caused to my shop. You're gonna have to give me something else. Come on. Pony up.
Sprig: [sigh] Will this work?
Loggle: What? What is this, uh...
[clicking]
Loggle: Oh. [clicking] Oh! I like this. You can go.
Sprig: Sorry, Anne. After all we worked for too.
Anne: It's okay. We'd better head home. Hop Pop's probably already awake and furious.
Polly: Probably a bad time to bring this up, but I still get the candy, right?
Hop Pop: [yawns] Whoa, boy. I needed that. Hope nothing happened while I was asleep to make me mad again. Oh, no. What did you do?
Sprig: What's up with canes? Who even needs them these days, am I right? Ow.
[sighs]
Anne: I'm really sorry, Hop Pop. I was goofing around, and I broke your favorite cane.
Hop Pop: You what?
Anne: I know, I know. I'll show myself out.
Sprig: We'll come visit you, Anne. We promise.
Polly: [crying] And just when I was starting to like you!
Anne: Don't make this harder than it is.
[kids bawling]
Hop Pop: What the-- What's going on?
Anne: You're throwing me out. You know, like you said you would.
Hop Pop: [sighs] Mmm. Anne, truth be told, I was never gonna throw you out. I was just talking tough so that you'd show me a little bit more respect.
Anne: That's kinda messed up, man.
Hop Pop: Heh heh heh. [inhales] Yeah. I probably was a little bit too harsh. But I only did it because you remind me of myself when I was your age. Rough around the edges. Now, put that bag down, young lady. You're not going anywhere.
Sprig: Whoo! Yeah! I like that.
Polly: Yeah! I wasn't worried.
Anne: Thanks, Hop Pop. So you're not mad about the cane?
Hop Pop: Oh, I'm furious about the cane. You're on dish duty for a month!
Anne: Ugh. Yes, sir!
Hop Pop: Now that that's settled, I wrote a long list of comebacks to get you back for this morning. [clears throat] "Hey, Anne, is that your hair, or is it a dandelion?" Ha. [sniffles] Uh-- Oh. Are those long, lanky limbs, Anne, or are those, uh, twigs? Ah! [chuckles] Eh...
Sprig: [coughs]
Hop Pop: The moment has passed, hasn't it?